Cooking on Cloud Wine

Category: Meat

  • These Mysterious Photos Of Twins Are Oddly Haunting. They’ll Stay In Your Memory.

    These Mysterious Photos Of Twins Are Oddly Haunting. They’ll Stay In Your Memory.

    But with the blast shield down, I can’t even see! How am I supposed to fight? Don’t be too proud of this technological terror you’ve constructed. The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the Force. I want to come with you to Alderaan. There’s nothing for me here now. I want to learn the ways of the Force and be a Jedi, like my father before me.

    The Rebel Force

    I need your help, Luke. She needs your help. I’m getting too old for this sort of thing. I don’t know what you’re talking about. I am a member of the Imperial Senate on a diplomatic mission to Alderaan– I want to come with you to Alderaan. There’s nothing for me here now. I want to learn the ways of the Force and be a Jedi, like my father before me. Oh God, my uncle. How am I ever gonna explain this? Ye-ha! The Force is strong with this one. I have you now.

    • I care. So, what do you think of her, Han?
    • Your eyes can deceive you. Don’t trust them.
    • I suggest you try it again, Luke. This time, let go your conscious self and act on instinct.

    Return of the Jedi

    The Force is strong with this one. I have you now. Don’t act so surprised, Your Highness. You weren’t on any mercy mission this time. Several transmissions were beamed to this ship by Rebel spies. I want to know what happened to the plans they sent you. Red Five standing by. Ye-ha! I suggest you try it again, Luke. This time, let go your conscious self and act on instinct.

    Imperial Star Destroyer

    I can’t get involved! I’ve got work to do! It’s not that I like the Empire, I hate it, but there’s nothing I can do about it right now. It’s such a long way from here. The plans you refer to will soon be back in our hands. Hey, Luke! May the Force be with you. You don’t believe in the Force, do you?

    1. I need your help, Luke. She needs your help. I’m getting too old for this sort of thing.
    2. Don’t act so surprised, Your Highness. You weren’t on any mercy mission this time. Several transmissions were beamed to this ship by Rebel spies. I want to know what happened to the plans they sent you.
    3. Look, I ain’t in this for your revolution, and I’m not in it for you, Princess. I expect to be well paid. I’m in it for the money.
    The Phantom Menace

    Don’t be too proud of this technological terror you’ve constructed. The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the Force. What good is a reward if you ain’t around to use it? Besides, attacking that battle station ain’t my idea of courage. It’s more like…suicide. I call it luck.

    Rebel Mission to Ord Mantell

    No! Alderaan is peaceful. We have no weapons. You can’t possibly… The Force is strong with this one. I have you now. A tremor in the Force. The last time I felt it was in the presence of my old master. I don’t know what you’re talking about. I am a member of the Imperial Senate on a diplomatic mission to Alderaan– I don’t know what you’re talking about. I am a member of the Imperial Senate on a diplomatic mission to Alderaan–

  • These Pixelated Portraits Are Created Using Something Unexpected, But Genius.

    These Pixelated Portraits Are Created Using Something Unexpected, But Genius.

    A lifetime of working with nuclear power has left me with a healthy green glow…and left me as impotent as a Nevada boxing commissioner. Kids, kids. I’m not going to die. That only happens to bad people. Kids, kids. I’m not going to die. That only happens to bad people. Slow down, Bart! My legs don’t know how to be as long as yours.


    The Itchy and Scratchy and Poochie Show

    D’oh. What’s the point of going out? We’re just going to wind up back here anyway. When I held that gun in my hand, I felt a surge of power…like God must feel when he’s holding a gun. Your questions have become more redundant and annoying than the last three “Highlander” movies.

    • Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you’d step over your own mother just to get one! But you can’t stop at one. You wanna drink another woman!
    • When I held that gun in my hand, I felt a surge of power…like God must feel when he’s holding a gun.

    Natural Born Kissers

    They only come out in the night. Or in this case, the day. Save me, Jeebus. I didn’t get rich by signing checks.

    The Last Temptation of Homer

    I can’t go to juvie. They use guys like me as currency. Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try. What good is money if it can’t inspire terror in your fellow man? Jesus must be spinning in his grave! Yes! I am a citizen! Now which way to the welfare office? I’m kidding, I’m kidding. I work, I work. And now, in the spirit of the season: start shopping. And for every dollar of Krusty merchandise you buy, I will be nice to a sick kid. For legal purposes, sick kids may include hookers with a cold.

    1. Jesus must be spinning in his grave!
    2. We started out like Romeo and Juliet, but it ended up in tragedy.
    3. I was saying “Boo-urns.”
    4. I’m a Spalding Gray in a Rick Dees world.
    Marge vs. Monorail

    Fame was like a drug. But what was even more like a drug were the drugs. Human contact: the final frontier. Oh, so they have Internet on computers now!

    Homer the Great

    How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive? I don’t like being outdoors, Smithers. For one thing, there’s too many fat children. I’ve done everything the Bible says — even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff! Homer no function beer well without. Me fail English? That’s unpossible.

  • 11 Reasons Why You Should Start Losing Weight Right Now. Like, Right Now.

    11 Reasons Why You Should Start Losing Weight Right Now. Like, Right Now.

    Keep your mind limber. Rorschach would say you have a hard time relating to others. Somehow, I doubt that. You have a good heart, Dexter. This man is a knight in shining armor. Keep your mind limber. You all right, Dexter?

    Born Free

    Watching ice melt. This is fun. Oh I beg to differ, I think we have a lot to discuss. After all, you are a client. I’m real proud of you for coming, bro. I know you hate funerals. He taught me a code. To survive.

    • I love Halloween. The one time of year when everyone wears a mask … not just me.
    • Finding a needle in a haystack isn’t hard when every straw is computerized.

    Take It!

    I’m going to tell you something that I’ve never told anyone before. I will not kill my sister. I will not kill my sister. I will not kill my sister. Like a sloth. I can do that. Cops, another community I’m not part of. I’m really more an apartment person.

    Father Knows Best

    You all right, Dexter? You all right, Dexter? He taught me a code. To survive. I’m really more an apartment person.

    1. Cops, another community I’m not part of.
    2. I’m doing mental jumping jacks.
    3. I think he’s got a crush on you, Dex!
    4. I’m really more an apartment person.
    Popping Cherry

    I think he’s got a crush on you, Dex! Cops, another community I’m not part of. I will not kill my sister. I will not kill my sister. I will not kill my sister. He taught me a code. To survive. I think he’s got a crush on you, Dex! Watching ice melt. This is fun.

    An Inconvenient Lie

    I’m generally confused most of the time. Rorschach would say you have a hard time relating to others. I love Halloween. The one time of year when everyone wears a mask … not just me. I’m really more an apartment person. Somehow, I doubt that. You have a good heart, Dexter.

  • Here Are The 25 Best Photobombs Ever Caught On Camera

    Here Are The 25 Best Photobombs Ever Caught On Camera

    There’s only one man I’ve ever called a coward, and that’s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I’m calling you is a television actor. Army had half a day. That’s why you always leave a note!

    Exit Strategy

    There’s so many poorly chosen words in that sentence. First place chick is hot, but has an attitude, doesn’t date magicians. Say goodbye to these, because it’s the last time!

    • Marry me.
    • Oh, you’re gonna be in a coma, all right.
    • I care deeply for nature.

    Amigos

    No! I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being with you. I’ve opened a door here that I regret. I care deeply for nature.

    Pier Pressure

    Oh, you’re gonna be in a coma, all right. I don’t understand the question, and I won’t respond to it. Not tricks, Michael, illusions. Across from where? Well, what do you expect, mother? No, I did not kill Kitty. However, I am going to oblige and answer the nice officer’s questions because I am an honest man with no secrets to hide.

    1. That’s what it said on ‘Ask Jeeves.’
    2. Well, what do you expect, mother?
    3. Marry me.
    4. It’s called ‘taking advantage.’ It’s what gets you ahead in life.
    5. Steve Holt!
    Ready, Aim, Marry Me

    What’s Spanish for “I know you speak English?” That’s what it said on ‘Ask Jeeves.’ Get me a vodka rocks. And a piece of toast. No… but I’d like to be asked! Really? Did nothing cancel? But I bought a yearbook ad from you, doesn’t that mean anything anymore?

    Afternoon delight

    We just call it a sausage. I’ve opened a door here that I regret. Marry me. No… but I’d like to be asked!